ok..so baby will finally be back tml. And yes, I am still alive and kicking.

The week was bored/bad, much worse when you have to be home-bounded. Hopefully this excuse will be sufficient to at least cushion the RATH of the lady on my lack of blogposts. Well its all finally over..baby will be back to cheer me up again.

Returned home after a round of usual mtg, but this time was "special". Or is it "different"? It set me thinking hard about the true meaning of friends. I tink its a tough one. What more could be said when even a-decade-long-friendship was finally put to the test, and in my opinion failed terribly and miserably. Are friends just people whom u find to fill up the vacant time slots of your lives or are they people whom you hope will be there to support you when you falter? Isn't it amazing when you feel that there will be these special ones out there to hold you when you fall but turn around to see absolutely nothing behind you. Or even worse, these "special ones" have somehow transformed into spikes behind you which makes the fall more painful. Perhaps its the expectations which cause the disappointments.

To me its all so disheartening.

And yes at the end of the day, maybe it just boils down to how much effort you yourself put into a friendship/relationship. Afterall, it takes 2 hands to clap..maybe it wasnt enough. But maybe you thought it was enough, but the feeling isn't mutual. Thus I would think being friends isnt really that simple - "like I am happy being with you and you are happy being with me kinda thing". The chemistry needed between both parties is most demanding. So I would urge all of you out there to definitely cherish your friends. But the most important thing to do before that..is set yourself thinking - is he/she my "friend"?

Yet again I was questioned on the topic of SMSes which went unreplied. To this, I would first like to apologize. No point arguing. It's my fault to leave SMSes unreplied. However, I wish to emphasize that it was never my intention to simply don't bother. Most of the time or in fact always, the situation is that I was thinking of an answer. And more than often, this thinking process gets kinda long and tedious that it just slipped off my mind. Okay, like I have explained to the lady and she knows. I am not one who plans things in advance, and my actions are significantly guided by my mood. I would not like to make promises to people in advance but end up breaking promises later. That is why I find it totally difficult to make decisions on events of the future and hence it's tough to reply such SMSes. To me, replying such SMSes probably has the difficulty of a EEE exam qns. If you find it hard to gauge this difficulty, just ask Ch - he will noe.

ok enough of crapping. I am tired..real tired.